Photo by Emily Green. Wedding originally published here.
It can be tempting after the year we’ve had to skip contemplation and head in full gusto to a brand new time without reflecting on what the hardships can teach us. But rumination can be cathartic, and 2020, albeit hard for everyone for all different reasons, has made a lot of us take stock on what things really matter to us.
Photo by Alon Gruber. Wedding originally published here.
In June we predicted the new era of weddings with our Reborn issue, and oh boy, were we right. Covid-19 put everything on pause, gave you the chance to take a beat, reassess what you REALLY wanted for your wedding and to trim the fat of the stuff you were doing just because it was cool… or trendy… or Pinterestable. With lockdowns looming, you got creative with your locations: a tattoo shop, your backyards, and the local park became places for you to celebrate your love with your nearest and dearest.
Photo by Weddings by Sally Rose. Wedding originally published here.Continue reading
After a year when most hen parties were either cancelled or hosted over Zoom, we asked you what you thought a new year could bring for this rite of passage…
Hen do, bridal shower, bachelorette party – wherever you’re from and whatever you call it, the celebration of the transition from Miss to Mrs is a time-honoured tradition and a good excuse to kick up your heels to mark the beginning of a new era.
We asked some of the members of our private Facebook group what their frets and fears were about planning a hen party in this new world we now live in. The response was clear – an overwhelming theme of uncertainty, being unsure of what to plan due to continuing local lockdowns, money worries and asking too much of friends.
So, what are the options? Do we plan differently, or throw caution to the wind and blow up the inflatable genitalia for a traditional L-plated bash? Ultimately, it’s got to still be a unique and awesome event, so here are some ideas to help you decide how to best celebrate.
Take control
It’s safe to say that a lot of control was taken away from 2020/ 21 couples. So, plan something that you can control. A safe bet is keeping your hen party outside in the fresh air, and that’s likely where you’ll be able to celebrate with more people, feeling comfortable and safe. Not always practical in the cold weather, but warmer months bring the promise of posh picnics with bespoke hampers and a fun theme, a small local music festival with authentic hay bales, or a punt down the river with champagne. Perfect for a smaller group, and easier to keep socially-distanced if needed.
If you and your friends are happy being inside, take control of your surroundings and hire a space – a small independent theatre for a movie night, an afternoon tea river cruise, or hire a countryside accommodation for the weekend and hunker down with fluffy blankets, monogrammed pjs, old movies and your body weight in popcorn alongside a few friends.
Courtney and Aaron wanted a casual wedding, with a relaxed and rustic vibe. They chose The Doyle, a warehouse turned chic industrial venue in downtown Las Vegas for the May wedding, with a very fun addition – the courtyard serves as a working farm where they have a variety of animals, from alpacas to goats to pigs roaming around. Not your average Vegas venue then!
They incorporated teals and various shades of blues into their laid back day; one of the couples’ favourite details were their matching bedazzled Nikes. Courtney wore a David’s Bridal dress, with the bridesmaids in Birdy Grey.
There really is no other day like your wedding day. It’s the ultimate day for ‘all things you’. But it’s not just that. It’s also the excuse to throw your dream party where none of your close friends and family are allowed to complain (to your face anyway).
This is both a joy and a curse because what starts out as a day all about love can turn into a monster event for 250 people with bells, whistles and a horse and carriage.
Take it from me, I wanted a Rock n Roll Bride wedding of the highest order. I wanted my wedding to be the most fun, beautiful and memorable ‘do’ that any of my guests had ever been to. I wanted the best photographer, the best venue, the best flowers and the best entertainment. I even wanted (and was lucky enough to get) a pink Cadillac to arrive in. Not to mention, I wanted a free bar so that everyone would get drunk and have a good time.
I was very lucky to have a beautiful day. But looking back at the whole experience, should I ever have to plan another wedding (for anyone), I would say…chill. out. babe. You are only in competition with yourself (regardless of what you may think) and sadly competing in the ‘Competitive Games of You’ is really a losing battle as the expectations we put on ourselves are far higher than we’d ever put on anyone else. During this unprecedented time, it’s likely that some things in your life may have to change, that likely includes your wedding plans, too.
If you’ve been dreaming about your big day since you were little, this might be a huge blow. Even if you haven’t, I know how easy it is, once you decide to get hitched, to get totally swept away in all the Instagram confetti inspiration. When we hold our wedding up as having to be ‘THE BEST DAY OF OUR LIFE’ but come on now, that’s a lot of pressure. It means that when something goes wrong (and it likely will), the impact can feel devastating. There is so much pressure to have ‘the perfect day’ that you can lose sight of the reason you wanted to get married in the first place…LOVE!
HERE ARE MY TOP TIPS FOR NAVIGATING CHANGE AND SHIFTING YOUR EXPECTATIONS:
REMEMBER THE REASON YOU WANTED TO GET MARRIED
I know it sounds ridiculous, but trust me, I barely saw my husband on my big day. I actually barely spent any time with my best friends because there were so many other people that I felt I needed to talk to. Write out your ‘why’:
Why do you really want to get married? Hopefully it’s about more than a big party. Then write out what you want to get out of your wedding (maybe include your partner in these
exercises, too!) Is it that you want to declare your love, or do you mostly want to see all the people you love together? How important is it to have a photo that you absolutely love of your grandma? Do you want to have a memory of you and your loved ones boogying on the dance floor? Let these be your North Stars when things start to change. When the planning seas get choppy, look at your list and let it guide you.
THINK OF THE ONE DETAIL THAT’S GOING TO MAKE YOUR HEART SOAR (AND LOOSEN UP ON THE REST)
It’s very hard to feel breezy about things when we’re holding the rope so tight on all our plans…so this is your invitation to ease your grip a bit. The likelihood is, your budget is not going to stretch to all that your heart thinks it needs for the big day. This can feel disheartening. In fact, when things change and we don’t want them to, it can really bloody suck! So, think of one really amazing detail that’s non-negotiable i.e. you really want an arch to get married under. Great, focus on this detail and go bananas on it. Make it THE thing you can feel most proud of. Then decide that whatever happens to the other plans, it really doesn’t matter.
I think it’s pretty safe to say that very few of us will be sad to see the back of the year 2020. For most of us it’s been painful, its been stressful and it’s been life changing. Things that we took for granted now feel like luxuries and things we assumed would be a given just, well, weren’t.
Wedding postponements, businesses closing, the ever-changing government guidelines – there’s been a lot to deal with in the wedding world particularly, and while it would be all too easy for me to regurgitate the clichés about love not being cancelled and us all being in this together, I think it is important to acknowledge that for many of us, this year has been one of the hardest of our entire lives.
I don’t know about you, but I’ve personally loved seeing how people have been adapting to this ‘new normal’ with their weddings (and wedding businesses) and in many ways this year has forced us to take it all back to what a wedding should actually be about. Getting married is not about spending an amount you really can’t really afford; it’s not about caring what other people think of your decisions and it’s not about having a guest list of 200 people.
Sure, a big wedding is absolutely awesome, and if you plan to have the large celebration later next year, more power to you. BUT if you were only doing those things because you thought you ‘should’, well, 2020 has been the perfect opportunity to do a complete 180.
I think it’s pretty safe to say that 2020 wasn’t the year any of us hoped for or expected, but that doesn’t mean there still aren’t many fabulous things to look back on – LEAST of all the 300-odd real weddings that we published across the Rock n Roll Bride blog and print magazine!
As an editor it’s always fun for me to look back and see which posts people enjoyed the most so today we’re throwing it back and sharing the top 10 most viewed weddings that we published over the past twelve months. Did your favourite make the list?
Starting off strong with Jen and Joe’s heavy metal inspired wedding. The couple hired a blank canvas of a venue which meant they could really put their own unique stamp on the day and oh boy did they! With a bespoke dress made to show of the bride’s tattoos, skulls as décor and some pretty epic smoke bomb portraits, it’s hardly surprising this wedding was so popular!
What could be better than your wedding day? Well, how about having THREE wedding days? Steph and hil wanted plenty of festival spirit for their summer wedding which they achieved by having it span over three whole days. Married in France they included nods to both the bride and groom’s Jewish and Catholic roots as well as plenty of bohemian flair.
This is a photo shoot in two parts, with two sets of real life couple models. Inspired by the 70s, we actually published a few shots in our last print issue, but we loved the images so much we wanted to share the full set with you today too!
Photographer Angela Gallo was inspired by a vintage shop near her home for the styling, “It’s basically a 70s dream!” she said. “One day I saw this little vintage lace wedding dress that caught my eye, and that’s when the idea hit me. I wanted to showcase two sides of an era, with the retro 70s bohemian look and a more retro-glam look.”
There’s a bit of a misconception in the wedding world that brides who want to wear black want to go all-out goth with their wedding theme too… but what if you wanted to combine your love of pretty florals with a penchant for a darker ensemble? Where exactly can you look for inspo?
Enter stage left, this beautiful editorial which was spontaneously put together by a group of UK-based wedding suppliers, led by photographer Ioana Porav. She explains, “My inspiration for the shoot was just to be very spontaneous! I had all the elements in my studio and literally overnight I called the model and I said to just create some fresh content and inspiration. Usually we work with a mood board or inspiration but this time was different.”
When Amanda and Mike set out to plan their 2020 wedding, eloping wasn’t on the cards but getting married in a pandemic means you have to shift gears a little! They had a big do planned for the weekend in July, but instead of postponing altogether, decided to get hitched anyway and in one of their favourite places in the world – Yosemite!
As the couple still plan to have an event with family and friends present sometime in the future, they kept things as low budget as possible and spent $2,500. The majority of this went on their photographer, and the rest was DIY.
Amanda wore a Melissa Sweet dress from David’s Bridal, with jewellery borrowed from her mum and step-mum. She made her own bouquet by going to the grocery store a couple of days before and picking out a couple of bunches to make a bouquet and buttonhole. Then it was time for an adventure!
Emma and Sela’s aim for their August wedding was to surround themselves all day with things that make them smile. As such, it turned into a mashup of rainbows, rugby, unicorns and happiness – you can’t get more unique than that! “I know I wanted a colourful wedding,” began Emma. “I wanted a day that represented ourselves whilst also valuing traditional aspects of our Jewish heritage.”
Emma chose a Fairy Goth Mother tea length dress, which she paired with Dolls Kill shoes for the ceremony, and Irregular Choice for the reception. She also wore her mum’s veil from her wedding in 1982, which was a personal touch. The bridesmaids wore a rainbow of pastel dresses from ASOS and she had her hair coloured especially for the day at Not Another Salon.
Although they didn’t want a themed wedding, Kate and Max were inspired by autumn, Halloween and their favourite movie, True Romance, for their October 2019 wedding. The timeline of their day was in reverse, and although this wasn’t what they initially wanted, it was a happy accident and in the end they were really pleased that they did it this way. Plus, it meant Kate was able to justify two wedding dresses!
She explains, “We left it quite late to book a registrar, so ended up having our celebration in a ‘reverse’ order to a traditional wedding. We had our wedding breakfast before our ceremony in the afternoon (the only time we could get a registrar for). Initially we were disappointed, but then realised at nearly every wedding we had ever been to, people were always starving hungry throughout the ceremony! So, it actually worked out really well.”
Dave Banks, Anita Hodgman, Nilesh Bell Gorsia, Matthew Rose
December 16, 2020
Lexi and Tom chose Islington Town Hall and Green Rooms, a local bar/ hotel, as the locations for their November wedding. It was important to them both that the day was as stress-free and fun as possible so they decided to ignore the traditional timeline and do an evening-only wedding with their ceremony at 5pm. They got ready together at home with their mates, wore coordinating pink outfits and matching Adidas sneakers, walked down the aisle to KC & Jojo and had a reading from Fleabag.
“My sister who has Down’s Syndrome was my ‘best woman’ and insisted on wearing white and being walked down the aisle with her own bouquet by my best friend Rob, who happily obliged”, Lexi told us. “Instead of bridesmaids I just invited the key women in my life to walk in pairs with me down the aisle, including my mother-in-law and sister-in-law as my husband lost his dad the year before.”
When Virginia and Cody had to postpone their big celebration, they were inspired to do the opposite of a traditional big ceremony. They wanted to take advantage of the perks of a small wedding and do things that you could not do with 150+ people to consider. Despite an intimate celebration, they still had two ceremonies; one for the just the bride and groom, and one for friends and family the day after.
As avid adventurers, the couple jumped at the chance to do things a little differently. For their first celebration, Virginia and Cody hiked three miles each way to their first look and personal vow ceremony in an alpine clearing just outside of Vail, Colarado. Afterwards, they were able to play around with photos in their finery and an amazing mountain backdrop.
With so many amazing real weddings being submitted to us every day (our readers really do have the BEST weddings!) its very rare that we publish styled photo shoots. HOWEVER, when we laid eyes on this clifftop beauty put together by wedding planner Periesa Oromé and photographer Rebecca Carpenter we were desperate to see more.
Periesa told us all about it, “I called this shoot ‘An Ode to Love’ because I wanted to throw out the bells and whistles that usually come with traditional weddings and focus on the intimacy, and love of the couple. I wanted the couple to do it their way and my aim is to encourage others that’re grappling with the number restrictions and reassure them that it’s totally okay to elope and do things on their own terms.”
Gema and Matt’s original wedding was June 7th, on their five year anniversary, for which they’d planned to wed in New York City, honeymoon in Kuala Lumpur and Bali and then have a big pub reception back home afterwards. It was due to cost them £25k but when Covid scrapped those plans they took the opportunity to re-evaluate everything. Although they still plan to have another big wedding next year, they really didn’t want to have to wait a whole year to be legally husband and wife.
On August 22nd they had a registry office ceremony at home in Leeds, followed by a portrait session with their photographers and bottomless brunch. They spent just £1000 (£2500 if you count the rings!)
Sarah and Robbie chose Glastonbury Tor as the location for the intimate handfasting. Due to Covid, they scrapped their plans for a big party, instead focusing on the ceremony with just a few loved ones in attendance followed by photos at Glastonbury Abbey. Overall, they were inspired by the colour green and Tolkien but as Sarah is a Priestess and herbalist, this played a huge role in their choice of ceremony, too.
It all kicked off at 6pm, “It was such an amazing day”, the bride began. “The sun shone, there was a cool breeze and we had loads of onlookers but we didn’t care everyone was so respectful and kind it made it feel more magical. Our ceremony was tailor made for us by Goddess Temple Weddings.”
David and Charlotte met on Tinder – neither were looking for a relationship at the time, but they just kept seeing each other and wanting to hang out. David originally didn’t want to elope, but Charlotte created a PowerPoint presentation outlining the pros and cons and how much fun it would be, and who could say no to that!?
The couple love old school Vegas and were inspired by Elvis and Pricilla’s wedding, but with the help of Rock n Roll Bride, they put a modern twist on it! “I knew I wanted a big pink mob wife coat and that we wanted to eat out favourite food and visit our favourite places,” explained Charlotte. “We just wanted a chill day, visit the Neon Museum, and be comfortable!”
Baglio di Pianetto, a winery in Sicily, was the setting for Jenn & Mike’s intimate wedding last year. Pre-pandemic, they still opted for a small wedding, inviting just 20 guests. The wedding took place on a Tuesday evening and after a short, symbolic ceremony, they hosted a simple Sicilian meal for their loved ones. They kept things as fuss-free as possible – there was no band, no big décor elements and no forced itinerary for the day.
Originally they planned to elope, but when their friends and families found out they were going to Sicily, where the groom’s grandparents were from, a few of them wanted to come along, too. The planned an adventure for everyone for the week before where they all travelled around the country in caravans visiting wineries, ruins, olive farms and beaches. The couple had some maps of the trip they all took made which were a really lovely memento of everywhere they went.
Call us vain, but we love hearing how Rock n Roll Bride magazine has helped with your wedding planning, but this may be a first! When Kirsty proposed to Vicky last year she used a copy of the magazine to do it!
She told us all about it, “On Sunday 17th November 2019, we were preparing to celebrate our one year anniversary. Vicky was keen for us to do a cute couple’s photo shoot (I do a fair bit of modelling so photo shoots are a fairly regular occurrence for me). I decided to take this idea and run with it, going all out with hair, makeup and wardrobe to give her the full VIP experience.”
“I knew I wanted to propose, and had actually bought an engagement ring several months earlier and had hidden it at my friend’s house! I’d also been meeting up in secret with my photographer friend Debbie to plan how best to capture the moment. I’m naturally quite a showboat whereas Vicky is a little more private so a photo shoot in our beautiful home seemed like the right balance of intimate and ostentatious! To give the proposal a strong element of tradition, I’d discussed my plan with Vicky’s parents who were quick to give their enthusiastic approval.”
If Little Red Riding Hood was a Rock n Roll bride and got married in 2020, we’re pretty sure her wedding would look a little something like this. Vero and Oscar (who were actually married pre-Covid in the summer of 2019) live in Barcelona and got married at Arborètum Mas Joan, a 12th century farmhouse where the owners’ family has lived since 1710.
Surrounded by the tallest trees in Catalonia, the couple hosted their wedding entirely on their own terms and complete with a basketball tournament, a pop up tattoo studio, painting activities for the kids and a football table to keep everyone entertained. For catering they had food trucks each covering some of their favourite counties and cuisines (Italian, Japanese, Indian and Spanish).
