Photography Credit: Olivia Locher

Sometimes I sit here and feel like a failure.

I have a job I love, a husband that makes me so incredibly happy, and a life I never thought I would… but still… sometimes, just sometimes, I feel like I’m a fraud. Like it’s all a front. Like it probably won’t last. Like it’s not real life or something.

I don’t know… do you ever just feel a little bit lost? That the constant pressure for perfection and to ‘be the best’ makes your head spin?

Sometimes I just want to throw my computer out the window and actually BREATHE. The constant need to reinvent, reinvigorate and revolutionise can be exhausting. But it’s vital for any long standing success and sometimes that pressure can be really intense. It feels a bit like running on a treadmill that’s constantly speeding up. I just hope that it doesn’t spin so fast that one day I fall off.

I don’t want this post to be a negative one and I don’t want you to think that I’m complaining… But I guess I just really want to tell myself – and you – that sometimes it’s actually OK to sit back and to have that time to breathe.

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It’s no secret that running your own business is hard work. When those heady first few weeks of excitement and anticipation are a distant memory, getting to – and staying at the top of your game can be a constant battle.

So if you’re near the start of your self-employment journey, what are the key skills you might need to give yourself a fighting chance?

1. Be a self starter

One of the things I hear over and over again is people who talk the talk about doing something new but never actually get round to it. Whether it be as small as starting a newsletter or picking a new logo to as big as re-branding or getting a new website made, it’s always the same. Too much talk and not enough action!

My advice? Stop procrastinating, stop making excuses and just do it! I’ve known people who faff over getting the perfect logo or twitter photo or strap line for months and months. Just pick something and get on with it! You are not Coca Cola so it’s OK if you change your mind later and go with something else.

In a nutshell, no one is going to do anything for you or tell you off if you don’t do the things you know you have to. But your business will suffer. You have to push yourself, yourself. You have to be your own nightmare boss, your own deadline setter, your own bank manager breathing down your neck.

2. Persistence

Things rarely happen quickly or without a significant amount of effort and hard graft. Even those people that you perceive to have been an overnight sensation have most likely worked their butts off for a very long time beforehand.

Don’t be put off if you don’t feel you’re getting to where you want to be right away. Persistence is vital. Do you know that most wannabe bloggers give up within the first 6 months? Keep on going… you’ll get there if you want it badly enough.

3. Don’t be afraid to hustle

Competition, especially in the wedding industry, is fierce and to get to the top you need to hustle. Hustle that little bootie off.

As a general rule us Brits (and I’d also say more women than men) hate to be seen to be showing off, but again, if you don’t do it no one else is gonna! You need to sell yourself. You need to put yourself out there. You need to let people know, in no uncertain terms, why you, and only you, are the person they need to book. This is not the time for shyness. So swallow that self-doubt and be loud and proud about your awesomeness!

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“Huraaaah!” was the resounding response that rippled through my Twitter feed when, seemingly simultaneously, two of the biggest social media platforms both made some exciting new announcements last week.

Firstly, Instagram profiles are now accessible online. Obviously Instagram is a phone ap, but it’s great to be able to see everyone’s photos, profiles and bios on your computer too. Plus it’s a huge bonus when writing about your own instagram on your blog as you can now link directly to it without having to use a 3rd party website (statigr.am must be GUTTED!)

My only small complaint with Instagram these days is that I’m a little bored of all the filters. Can an updated set of filters be in the works please Mr. Instagram? Being an Andorid user I’m limited on decent editing aps as it is, so my only option really is to upload my photos to my computer, edit them in photoshop and then re-upload them – it’s a pain in the butt!

Do you think the online profiles will make any difference to how you use Instagram?

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In the late 80s, with the popularity of chat shows on the rise, television producers would always have ‘go to’ standby guests in case somebody pulled out at the last minute. After a while it seemed that any time this happened it would be Christopher Biggins who filled in… I guess because he was always available (aww)! Biggins swiftly became known on the circuit as a ‘professional guest’, and needless to say, was a bit of a running joke.

When I heard this story this week, I immediately started thinking about guest blogging and whether it’s a good thing to be so readily available all the time…

Write for the right blog

Writing attractive guest posts can be hard work and you really need to make sure you’re pitching the right content to the right blog. It’s imperative that the blog you’re being featured on has a large and engaged audience, but more than that, attracts a similar niche of reader to the one you want to. There can be great benefits to getting a solid guest post featured, but it is important to be strategic about what you write and where it’s published.

You really only want to be writing for another blog that has a larger audience than your own and who’s readers regularly engage and respond to guest posters. Some blogs survive with the majority of their content being guest submitted, whereas for others it’s a rarity. If you’re pitching to the latter, I would imagine this to be a less successful strategy as the readers won’t be used to engaging with writers who are not the owner of the blog.

Guest posts are a great way to promote your product or services to a brand new audience but you need to be clever about how you pitch yourself and not come across as over salesy or spammy. That’s a sure-fire way to put people off. Think about what you’re going to write about but also who you’re writing for.

Don’t over-commit

However tempting or flattering, signing up for a regular column without testing the water first is a bad idea. Never over-commit yourself (especially if you’re not getting paid – which you rarely will). There’s nothing worse than having a column that your dreading writing because it never gets you anything in return. Yes, I strongly believe that regular and consistent presence somewhere is the best way to convert casual readers into loyal fans, but before you commit to anything long-term, dip your toes in the water.

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