On Feeling Guilty

Devlin Photos

July 1, 2014

Rainbow Rock n Roll Bride

The rumours are true, I’m obsessed with my work. But I have a dirty little secret… I sometimes feel really guilty about just how very obsessive I am.

Confession time (deep breath). On an almost daily basis I have that overwhelming feeling of guilt that I’m devoting too much time to this blog and not enough to everything – and everyone – else. As painful as it is to admit, I often feel like I’m letting everything else play second fiddle to work. That, by the way, is an awful feeling to have.

I am so incredibly lucky that I have an understanding husband. He supports me and my choices so much and our relationship has never been stronger. But every time I only half listen to what he’s saying because I’m concentrating on something else, every time I have to get back on a plane, every time I have to head up to my computer as soon as dinner is finished… I feel bad.

So how to we banish it? Can we ever let things slide a little but still strive to be the very best at what we do?

Danielle LaPorte once said, “The guilt of following your heart is a weight you can bear if your dream is strong enough. It’s the price of admission to fulfilment. You’re going to feel guilty. Breathe. Keep going.”

I’ve recently come to realise that, although guilt is an inescapable part of running your own business, that sometimes things really can wait. I was actually talking about this with Gala a few weeks ago. She was telling me that she’d taken a whole Sunday off just because and that it was wonderful. “Well that’s very nice”, I thought, “but what would I do? I’d be SO BORED if I wasn’t working…”. And then it hit me. How incredibly depressing is that? Is that what my life has become? Nothing but work, work, work?

I’m not going to lie, it’s a bitter pill to swallow. It’s hard for me to stay away from work, but I’ve been trying. And I’ve quickly realised that it really doesn’t matter if that email stays in my inbox a little while longer, my blog posts aren’t scheduled as far in advance as I might like, or my spreadsheets aren’t in their most perfect order. Perfection is a massive myth… in fact it’s a big fat lie.

Real life, and having a life, is what really matters. Isn’t that the whole reason why we do what we do anyway? Following your dream isn’t easy, we all just need to make sure that the ultimate goal is still worth it.