Ashley and Colin had known each other for 20 years before their friendship turned into something deeper. Neither had expected their relationship to take a romantic turn, but once it clicked there was nothing like it. This summer they gathered 200 people for a goth glam wedding at a golf club, and are now expecting their first baby girl in September.

The setting may have been traditional, but their version came with skulls, skeletons, rock music and deep red and black florals.

Ashley and Colin wrote their vows separately and waited until they were standing in front of their guests to hear them. Somehow, they had written almost the same thing. “Our vows were almost the EXACT same!” Ashley laughed. “It was crazy because we hadn’t even talked about what each of us might say until we read them to each other until we were in front of 200 people! I guess when you’re with your person things like that just kind of work out that way.”

One of the ceremony’s most personal details was kept secret from Colin and his mum. Colin’s dad had died five years earlier, so Ashley reserved a chair for him. As the bridesmaids entered, each placed a white rose on the chair. It gave his memory a physical place within the ceremony and allowed the family to mark his absence together.

Once the formalities were finished, the reception turned into the full-on party Ashley and Colin had planned. Guests filled the dance floor as rock music was pumped out, and people were making song requests all night. Even the table plan became part of the fun. Ashley deliberately seated some guests with people they didn’t know, creating new groups that later reunited on the dance floor.

Ashley was happy to delegate the handmade elements to her maid of honour, her mum and her younger brother. An old birdhouse was transformed into a card holder, her brother 3D printed skulls for the flowers, along with partial skeleton figures that were decorated with more blooms. The mix of bones and florals brought their goth glam theme onto the tables without turning the golf club into a themed set.

The day reflected Ashley’s attitude towards wedding planning – make a decision, keep moving and remember what the event is for. “Don’t stress”, she advises. “I was not stressed out for one second. If something didn’t work then it didn’t work – that’s not what the day was about. I was just so excited to marry this man that noting else really was a worry to me. Make your own rules! I didn’t follow any rules we did our wedding the way we wanted!”