Titi and Chris’ September wedding at Dive Palm Springs unfolded beside the pool with a cosmic disco dress code, barbecue, boba, a dog officiant and guests dressed for what they described as “if the sun and the moon were getting married and all the stars were invited.”

As a non-binary, bisexual bride, Titi wanted the wedding to celebrate self-expression rather than tradition. “The theme of the wedding was cosmic disco”, they said. “We wanted the wedding to feel like a big celestial party. We took inspiration from award shows and red carpets, with emphasis on every guest feeling like a main character and not just the bride and groom. With our loud personalities and individual style, we instructed our guests to be as bold and loud as they could – explicitly telling them not to shy away from outshining the couple. This was important to us because we felt every guest played a unique part in our love story and was hand-picked to be there for the cosmic union. Much like at an awards show, there’s time and space to celebrate everyone, and we felt it important to honour our queerness and let guests express themselves fully and authentically through their style.”

The couple had originally planned to marry after starting a family. After experiencing pregnancy loss, they decided to move ahead with the wedding. Then, shortly after ordering the dress, Titi found out they were pregnant. By the time the gown was finished, it no longer fit and, three weeks before the wedding, they started over with an off-the-rack sample.

Dogs were part of the celebration too. Their own dog, Wushu, carried the rings, while Willoughby, owned by comedian Brendan Fitzgibbons, took on officiating duties with Brendan translating throughout the ceremony and later acting as MC during ‘dogtail hour.’

They rented all 11 rooms at the boutique hotel, giving everyone a place to stay while turning the entire property into one long weekend celebration. They wanted everyone to be able to relax and not have to worry about moving to different locations throughout the day.

There was no formal sit-down meal. Smokey Lips BBQ handled the food, boba was served to every guest, fries arrived from the bar across the street and the wedding cake came from Whole Foods. Titi decorated the $32 cake themselves on the morning of the wedding with handmade rubber duck toppers wearing matching tuxedos and fresh blackberries.

After the ceremony, speeches took place beside a champagne tower before Titi and Chris headed straight into the swimming pool wearing their wedding clothes. The couple had packed swimsuits for the occasion but decided the desert temperature made changing unnecessary.

Music stayed in the family. Titi’s twin sister, a professional DJ and maid of honour, curated the soundtrack alongside friends, while the first dances became performances in their own right. The couple choreographed a bachata routine together, Chris danced salsa with his mother, and Titi and their father closed with a cowboy medley featuring line dancing, swing and hip hop.

Looking back, the only thing Titi wishes they’d done differently was taken more time portraits around the hotel and hired someone to arrange the flowers they had bought but never displayed.

Their advice for anyone planning a wedding is to enjoy the process as much as the day itself. “Bookmark things you like on social media, and let yourself get excited about all the frills. You might not end up doing them all, but so much of the fun is planning and daydreaming.”

For Titi, embracing every version of themselves became one of the most meaningful parts of the experience. “Throughout the whole planning process, I was really grateful for how my partner supported my gender fluidity and expression… I do love dressing up both femme and masc, and the wedding felt like it really embraced both of our multi-faceted identities throughout. As a non-binary bride, I thought I’d feel overwhelmed and stifled by the stereotypical bridal aesthetic, but I actually didn’t at all. I think the fact that we decided to have everyone end up in swimsuits made the wedding itself not feel overly performative or stuffy in the end.”