You have spent months answering questions. Round tables or rectangular? Plated dinner or buffet? Blush, bashful or a third shade of pink that kinda looks exactly the same? And don’t get us started on all the guest questions that were already covered on your perfectly organised wedding website (eye roll!) Even the most relaxed wedding can generate way more decisions than you expected.

Then comes the honeymoon, and it feels like yet another project to manage. But it doesn’t have to be. Instead, think of it as a chance to disappear for a while. Switch off the group chat, log out of social media and enjoy being together without a schedule, an audience or a table plan.

Start by working out what you need after the wedding. Some couples want two weeks on a sunlounger. Others prefer loud cities and late-night bar hopping. Or you might want art galleries, a romantic cruise, cold-water swimming, theme parks or a tiny hotel room above a boulangerie.

Wherever you go, resist the urge to fill your schedule. Your honeymoon is supposed to be a time to relax and enjoy each other, every empty space. A day without a booking is not a failure, it creates room for the restaurant you find by accident, the beach you decide to return to or the four-hour disco nap that turns out to be the highlight of the week.

You have probably spent enough of the past year operating according to a strict timeline. Nobody needs to announce that cocktails will commence at 18:30 or that sunset photographs have been allocated precisely 17 minutes. Of course book anything that would genuinely upset you to miss, then leave the rest alone.

The same principle applies to packing. TikTok may try to convince you that marriage requires a coordinated capsule wardrobe made entirely from white linen, but your existing clothes are still legally permitted after the ceremony. Take things you know you enjoy wearing, comfortable shoes and one outfit that makes going out for dinner feel like an event. A practical packing guide can help you fit everything in to your suitcase and ensure you don’t forget anything.

Set a honeymoon budget based on the money you actually have after the wedding. Starting married life with an enormous credit card bill is significantly less romantic than choosing a shorter trip, travelling later or spending a week somewhere closer to home. Your honeymoon does not become more meaningful because you flew business class or stayed in a suite. You have the whole rest of your lives together to earn more money and go on more adventures together!

Waiting can also work in your favour. A mini-moon immediately after the wedding gives you time to sleep, eat and process everything that happened. The bigger trip can take place months later when your annual leave, finances and nervous system have recovered. It also gives you another event to look forward to once the wedding photographs have arrived and everybody has stopped asking how married life feels.

Most importantly, plan for the people you are rather than the honeymooners you think you should become. If you hate spas at home, a couples’ massage overlooking the Mediterranean may still be two people silently wishing it would end. If you never eat breakfast, paying extra for rose petals around a 7am room-service tray is unlikely to transform you. Romance can look like sharing chips on a balcony, visiting an obscure museum, finding a bar that plays your favourite band or sitting beside each other in complete silence.

The wedding asked you to gather everyone together. The honeymoon gives you permission to vanish. Go somewhere you both want to see, do less than you think you should and return when you are ready to talk to people again.