You guyssssss, 2020 is a real fucking trip. My heart goes out to everybody effected by what’s going on right now (so that’s the entire world then?) not least of all those of you that have a wedding that was supposed to happen over the next few months. There have been so many articles and social media posts written recently about how to postpone your weddings (I particularly liked this one from Happiful magazine) but this is not another one of those. Instead, today I wanted to today talk to you about how (once you’ve dealt with the drama, pain and logistics of actually postponing your day) you can now move forward and use this time in the very best way possible.
The fact of the matter is that problems/ bumps in the road/ challenges are a fact of life, and whatever way Covid-19 is affecting you right now (with your business or job, with health concerns, with worries about vulnerable members of your family, or with dealing with your wedding) it is our attitude toward them that matters the most.
I fully appreciate that what I’m about to say may ruffle a few feathers, in fact it may darn right piss you off but I TRULY, with my whole entire being, believe that that how you approach what is happening will either pay dividends to your mental health and how you move on from this moment… Or it won’t. It’s up to you, boo.
We have been given the gift of time. That’s a fact. Yes, the other side of the coin is that there is also a lot of emotional pain, money worries and trauma to deal with, but that doesn’t take away from the fact that most of us (BIG love to all the NHS staff and key workers keeping the country going right now) now have a lot of extra time on our hands.
I choose to focus on the good. Focusing on the positives around this situation doesn’t in anyway negate the negatives. However, I simply choose to put my focus on the (however small) slithers of hope and joy that I’m witnessing. You may call me idealistic, you may call me naive, you may even call me privileged but this is how I choose to view the world, not only throughout this pandemic, but my entire life! This is also your choice to make.
Think about it this way (and thanks to Sophia Hilton for this analogy – I stole it from an Instagram Live she did last week) If you booked a holiday to the Maldives, would you sit on your sun lounger complaining that you’d spent all this money to be there? Would you wake up every day and say “OMG we’re going to have to eat baked beans for a month to pay for this!” No, you would ENJOY THE FUCK out of that holiday. Yes, it cost you a lot of money to get there, but while you’re there you may as well use and enjoy the time you have in paradise.
In the same way, Coronavirus has potentially cost you a lot. You may have lost your job, you may have had to postpone your wedding, you may have even lost a loved one and that’s all absolutely rubbish BUT what are you going to do next? Are you going to sit around and complain about it, or are you going to make the very best you can out of this bad situation?
In short, use this time to make your wedding EVEN more amazing than it would have been before. Use this time to get all those DIY projects done that you would have definitely run out of time to do otherwise. Use this time to figure out what you can do to give back to your suppliers that have been so utterly amazing to you. Use this time to research even more amazing wedding ideas. Hell, you could even use this time to start your own wedding business!
You now have the opportunity to think about what you really want your wedding to be. Maybe you got swept up in the idea of planning a big, expensive wedding but now you actually think you really want to change your plans and elope, or pair down your ideas and budget instead?
I choose the believe that better days are coming. I choose to trust that even when bad things happen to us (and believe me, I’ve had times in my life that have been utterly traumatic to deal with) they make us stronger and more grateful for what we have. I choose to realise that however awful things are right now, they are all part of the magic of life and they are going to be the catalyst for a much more inspiring redemption story!
I hope you are all keeping safe and healthy. I hope you are all telling your family and friends how much you love and appreciate them. I hope you are showing immense gratitude for our NHS, our supermarket workers, delivery drivers and your wedding suppliers that are going above and beyond to help you navigate this uncertain and stressful time. But most of all I hope you are being kind to yourself and others.
You got this babe. Fist bump.