From prioritising your budget, to recognising good deals, finding your people, and avoiding those oh-so-tempting money-pits – here’s a step-by-step guide to planning a dream day that won’t financially ruin you.

“Only £16,000 for the day? Sounds reasonable. And that’s with…oh, that’s without food? Yeah, I guess that makes sense. And the drinks are…? Of course. But presumably we get the…right, so it’s extra for the chairs as well then, is it? PLUS tax? Why would you quote me without… Uggh never mind. Yeah, I know it’s our ‘special day’. Fuck it…Amex?”

Welcome to the wedding world.

It’s a place where money loses all meaning. Where your perception of value is warped, and impatiently belittled; where “why is it so much?” will live forever on your lips.

And now you’re engaged (congratulations, by the way), this place is your new home.

So, what are your options here? YOLO your way to financial ruin? Penny-pinch, stress, and give yourselves a hernia?

Allow me to introduce you to Option Number Three…

Brace for the Budget…

This is a tough conversation, so I’m gonna have it for you. The first thing you need to do is work out how much you can actually afford.

💰 How much have you got in your savings?
💰 How much debt are you comfortable with? (My wife and I are still paying off our fairly modest wedding, and our 10th anniversary is in June.)
💰 Are your parents helping? If so, how much?

Add it all up, and you have your ceiling. Your absolute max, not-a-penny-more figure. Now for the tricky bit… how much of that do you *actually want* to spend?

Because this is a life-changing amount of money, right? And by choosing a big wedding, you’re choosing to press pause on the rest of your life. To stay renting, or delay that big house move. To skip that new car, or that bucket-list holiday you could never quite afford.

I’m not trying to put you off. If this is what you want, do it, and do it without any regrets. Just be mindful of what you’re giving up in exchange.

Got a figure? Great. Now write it down and fucking stick to it.

Sort Out Your Priorities

Here’s a fun thought: whatever you spend on one thing, you cannot spend on another. (Dramatic pause to let that sink in.)

Since you can’t spend it twice, every penny you spend has consequences. That bougie photographer will cost you your photobooth. Fancy flowers will cost you a videographer. An extra course at dinner will cost you a live band. See what I mean? Consequences.

And it works the other way around too. Ditch that fancy stationery, and you can get that bucking bronco.

So, before you jump into planning, set out your priorities – as individuals, and as a couple. What are your must-haves? What are you most looking forward to? What will make you happiest? What would you always regret not having?

Write them down, and then book them first.

Then once all the important stuff is paid for, you know how much you have left to spend on the fun little extras.

What’s a Reasonable Price?

For every supplier, Google/ ask ChatGPT the “average cost of…” and get a ballpark figure. As advice goes, it seems a bit crude-and-obvious, but it’s a good way to see where someone’s price-point sits compared to everyone else.

This is where your priorities come into play. The fun bit. The ‘planning your dream day’ bit.

If you absolutely LOVE a photographer, you’ve always wanted that live band, that dream venue, that spectacular outfit – then spend the money. Treat yourselves, enjoy it, and make the necessary cut-backs elsewhere. If it’s pointlessly pricey (and you couldn’t give a fuck anyway), keep looking.

There’s no such thing as a ‘wrong’ price, or a ‘wrong’ supplier. This is your day. If it’s in your budget, and it’s important to you, book it. If it isn’t, don’t.

Oh, and beware of prices that seem too good to be true (especially for suppliers with high operating costs, like florists, or caterers). If they’re half the price of everyone else, there’s bound to be a reason.

Finding Your ‘Tog and ‘Vog

Are cheap photographers and videographers shit? Sometimes, yes. But not always. Sometimes they’re just new to the game.

Take me and my wife, for example. I’d shoot your wedding for £200 and I would be shit. Like, “oh wow, this guy’s really shit”, shit. My wife shot her first wedding for £200, and it ended up on the cover of a magazine.

But experience – whilst pricey – has its advantages. Someone who’s shot hundreds of weddings will be on it like Sonic. They’ll know where they need to be, what to do if something happens. They’ll be calm. And that calmness will pour into you.

And this is a weird one, but some of them don’t *want* to charge more. Lower-budget weddings tend to be more fun; less content-y, less hung-up on perfection.  I know some very talented photographers (and videographers) who stay at a lower price-point because they like the kinda couples it attracts.

The moral of the story? Use their price as an indicator, but not as a rule.

If you love their work, follow them on socials. Watch their Stories to catch a vibe. And if you like them, book a no-strings call and see if they’re the one.

Ditch the Money-Pits

“Oh great, a wooden carving of my name…erm…thanks?” (*Takes it home, throws it away*)

Now times that by 70, and you’ve just wasted £350. That’s bucking bronco money right there.

There is loads of pointless shit like this – wedding favours, separate flower arrangements for your ceremony and reception, second (and third) outfits, a fancy vintage car you’re in for the 10 minute drive to the church…

None of these things actually add anything to your wedding experience. They just eat into your budget, and when the day’s over, you throw them all away.

So, ditch the money-pits. Sack off the generic wedding favours (or DIY them instead). Repurpose your ceremony flowers; have the bridesmaids’ bouquets as centrepieces. Choose one outfit you LOVE that can be adapted to different looks. Get an Uber or have someone you know drive you to the ceremony! You’re not being ‘cheap’, you’re being sensible, and eco-friendly. And all that money you’ve saved can be spent on the things that matter. 

Craft Your Experience

Do you want to know what the most expensive thing about getting married is? Expectations.

It’s dinner for distant uncles, random plus-ones, and friends of friends. It’s that Insta-ready venue (you secretly hate), the extra course, the open bar. It’s having the day other people want you to have, instead of having a day for you.

So, when you’re planning your wedding, craft the experience you want. The moments you’ll always remember, the details you love, the things you enjoy, the people who matter.

And everything else? Fuck it off with a smile.

Plan a day that will make you happy, and I promise you this: every single penny will be money well-spent.