My friends are mostly introverts or neurodivergent. What are some hen do ideas that won’t overwhelm anyone or feel like a performance?

As long as you are spending time with your closest pals, then anything goes when it comes to hen parties. If organised fun weekends are not for you, choose something gentler that allows your friends to participate at their own pace, without a big group spotlight or chaotic schedule.

Something as simple as ’sip and paint’, or a crafting activity can be just as fun and bonding as a drinking game in the pub. If you are planning to go away for the weekend, then a country walk and pub lunch are always a winning combination, or an evening spent playing your favourite board game with drinks and nibbles.

My partner and I have a shared friendship group. Is it weird to have a joint pre-wedding do for all our friends? Also, how do we avoid it feeling like a big beige ‘team building day’?

If your friendship circles are blended, celebrating together can feel more authentic. The trick is to choose something your group would normally enjoy, but with a little extra sparkle.

If your group is an ‘Ibiza weekend’ crowd, you could hire a villa and bring in a chef for a relaxed celebratory dinner. If your vibe is more countryside getaway, pick a place that’s slightly nicer than you’d usually book and arrange for a catered meal or dinner in a private room at a local restaurant.

There are no rules for a joint pre-wedding party, you don’t have to do an over-the-top activity, and can even separate into smaller groups for activities that don’t appeal to all.

The key is simply to make it feel distinct from your usual weekends away – familiar, but special.

My best friend wants to throw me a surprise hen do. I hate surprises. How do I set a boundary without crushing their enthusiasm?

If the idea of a surprise fills you with dread, it’s completely okay to say so. Say to your bridesmaids something like, “I’d feel happiest if we planned the hen do together.” They’re your closest friends, they want you to feel comfortable and celebrated, not overwhelmed.

This approach means you can decide the key elements as a group: where you’ll stay, what you’ll do and the general vibe/them; but still leaves plenty of space for them to add thoughtful, personal touches – small surprises, keepsakes, or games throughout the weekend that will genuinely feel meaningful rather than stressful.

You’re not removing the magic; you’re simply making sure the magic works for you. It’s your celebration, and you are allowed to shape it in a way that you like. Rather than feeling offended they are much more likely to feel relieved to not have to make every single decision – it’s pretty daunting planning a hen from scratch!

I don’t want to ask people to spend £400+ on flights or accommodation just because I’m getting married. What are some financially ideas for a hen do which won’t feel like a lame compromise? 

It’s a cliché, but the parts you’ll remember aren’t how fancy the hotel was, or if the cocktails had edible flowers. It will be the laughter, and shared memories of everyone being together, for you.

If you want to keep things budget-friendly, something like a bottomless brunch is a brilliant starting point. They’re easy to organise, everyone knows what to expect, and the price is fixed, so you know up front what it will cost. After that, adding a fun group activity like karaoke, bowling, mini golf, or even a paint-your-own-pottery session are all surprisingly affordable, especially when split between a group.

If you want to carry on into the evening, then skip the bar queues (and prices!), and instead head home for a night of games. This could be a hen party themed game, or a classic like Monopoly or Cluedo. Add a playlist of nostalgic bangers, and you have an intimate, celebratory night in with your besties, for free!

About the Author

Danielle Kendall is the founder of Team Hen, a modern bridal brand redefining hen party gifting with style and heart. After noticing a gap between tradition and what brides actually wanted, she created a destination for chic and playful celebration essentials. Danielle champions inclusive, relaxed, and personality-led hen parties, helping brides feel seen. Her approach has made Team Hen a go-to for contemporary, design-led hen party inspiration for the last 10 years.