The Power of Positivity: What’s the Nicest Thing That’s Been Said to you Recently?

Yesterday’s School of Rock was magical. We were a room full of girls (and er… Gareth – although I don’t think he minded at all!) chatting about business, blogging and everything in between. I left on a total high, feeling proud of the little space I was able to create and excited to have made a gaggle of new friends.

One of the topics at my workshops that always sparks the most debate and questions is that of dealing with online negativity. I don’t hold back when I’m asked about it. In fact I have very strong feelings on the matter and unashamedly honest about the whole thing.

But you know what, sometimes it’s so easy to focus on the bad things that happen and sweep the good stuff under the carpet. I mean, if I asked you what the last mean thing someone said to you was I’m sure you could recall it quickly, but if I asked about the last compliment or bit of praise you received, I bet it would be harder for you to remember right?

Which is why I’m a huge advocate for writing any positive messages down and saving any lovely emails or that tweets I get. In fact I have a whole folder on my computer where I stash all this loveliness. It’s the most positive, sparkly, rainbow-fueled folder of happiness ever! Then, when I’m having a down day, a quick read of a couple of those lovely things puts me right back on my positive track.

So today, I thought I’d share with you some of the lovely tweets I’ve received over the last few hours about yesterday’s School of Rock. I’m gonna keep riding that positive wave as long as I can!

Don’t you just feel so much more optimistic after reading all that lot? I can’t encourage you enough to focus on the good stuff and how vital it is for your sanity! Did you know optimism can be learned? You can train yourself to have a more positive outlook on life, and I strongly believe that remembering the lovely things people say to you is completely imperative to getting there.

So I ask you, what was the last compliment you received? Don’t be shy now…

33 comments

  1. This post made me feel all tingly.
    I keep a little notebook with all the lovely compliments I recieve – thank you for the idea Gala Darling!

    The latest entry is from a bride this morning who absolutely loved her custom head piece –

    “Thanks Jen, so pleased with it, and the hairdressers thought it was fantastic too, they want your card!”

    The little book helps me to get going again in the face of negativity. I recommend it to everyone!

  2. Ahhh, it was such an awesome day. Your School of Rock is so inspiring. I have just had some lovely compliments from some fab folk on the latest wedding that I shot and it has totally made my morning :-) It is always very welcome to get positive feedback.

  3. A folder of loveliness is a great idea :)

    We received a lovely comment on our Facebook page just this morning from a bride-to-be:

    “Just wanted to say a huge THANK YOU for making your website so I could obtain my beautiful wedding dress at a very affordable price :-) xxx”

    It’s so lovely to receive a completely spontaneous comment like this, and has certainly made me have a spring in my step today!

  4. MrsSpoon

    I can’t agree more about how optimism can be learnt. I was picked on when I was younger, and usually for the way that I looked physically. When someone did pay me a compliment, I used to think it was an extension of the bullying and they were making fun of me.

    I spent so much time thinking about how I could change (plastic surgery was the only option realistically) and I used to get stressed and depressed about it. My mum then said something that has stuck with me ever since –

    ‘If people don’t like you the way you are and for who you are, then that’s their issue and their not worth knowing or engaging with.’

    I started to look at myself and started to realise I actually liked myself and it was other people trying to make me feel bad. I also then realised only I could make myself feel bad. I now accept compliments with a big smile and a ‘Thank You’ and I believe the compliments I get.

    I can honestly say that I can’t remember (other than at school) when someone was last mean to me – at least to my face. I refuse to have those kinds of people in my life. However, I’m under no disillusion that this won’t change – especially as I start to put myself out there with the blog etc. but as long as my glass is always half full then I think I’m going to be OK.

    I’m definitely going to adopt that notebook idea too. I love a notebook!!

    Ooh and the last compliments I received were at yesterday’s School of Rock about our wedding. I’m smiling now as I think of them :D

  5. Loved your wedding Mrs Spoon and that dress you wore yesterday was super cute. I got lots of compliments on how my shoes matched my dress yesterday… It’s a right love fest in here today :-)

  6. Awwww so sweet – well I can tell you from 1st hand experience that the school of rock definitely kicks serious ass!

    The last compliment I received was last night – did an Indian engagement party and one of the guests was a bridesmaid at one of my recent weddings. She told me how chuffed the couple were with the photos and the bride’s mum, who initially didn’t see the point of having a professional photographer, upon seeing the photos was completely bowled over and told them she now “gets it”. Aaaaand my heart melted x

  7. Post author

    Ahh Shell you’ll have to come to another school of rock though, im well more profesh than the first one!

  8. I keep a folder of thank you emails for work stuff but somehow lose track of the more personal compliments, however I did receive a compliment on my dress this morning so that was nice! I’ll try to keep a note of more in future.
    PS Never before have I met a more upbeat group of women than at yesterday’s School of Rock, something to aspire to.

  9. Natasha Bayliss

    I completely agree! Great group of lovelies! :)

    A person I see regularly is very negative/excels at moaning. They are really nice and I care, but it’s now been years of it, every day and a colleague and I have reached our limit. We made the decision to not feed their ‘negative hoovering’ ways anymore. It sounds harsh, but I’ve taken a step back and am not getting dragged in to it all… I even ignore some texts now (I’m such a bad friend, I know). I was happy before… I tend to focus on the good, getting over excited about the smallest of things, always taking a reality check and being grateful for my lot… but I feel that extra level of fluffy bunnies, sunshine and rainbows is back since I’m not taking on her dark cloud of doom too.

    Then the topic came up at the School of Rock yesterday and it was great to see it with lots of other people on the positivity side of the fence. I’m still bouncing. An afternoon/evening well spent :)

  10. Natasha Bayliss

    Oh and I’m definitely going to set up a ‘Go, Me!’ folder or notebook. Great idea!

  11. Did you know it actually takes 10 positives to out weigh 1 negative!!!

    It is so nice to hear positives, spesh in business, I feel really proud when wedding guests rave about the photobooth! I still find it difficult to take on personal compliments but I’m working on that!

  12. I keep a folder of the thank you emails I receive from my customers. If ever I feel blue, I read through them and remind myself why I do what I do.

    This makes me smile so much (from last weekend’s Bride)…

    “Thankyou so so so much for the wonderfully beautiful cake you made and set up for us on Saturday. I didn’t see it until I was in my seat for dinner and my Mum said ‘have you seen the cake?!’ and I got up and went to see it and was blown away. Honestly, it was the most beautiful cake I have ever seen and looked so perfect with the flowers and our cake topper!”

    Feels terribly un-British to share this but this post is so fabulous that I want to do my bit to carry on the positivity.

    I definitely choose to be happy. Mwah!

    Cxx

  13. Ha ha! Whilst reading your post I received this text from a close friend, and it made me cry! “you’re an amazing mum, if I could be half as awesome at it as you, when I have kids, I’d be chuffed as hell”. LOVE your idea of having a love box on your computer, will be nabbing that idea Kat! Will start by putting in this post ;-) big hugs xxx

  14. The last compliment I received was from Marisa who I met at School of Rock yesterday who tweeted me to say she loves me work! Yay for new friends. School of Rock errr.. rocks it! Despite a rather hefty hangover have woken up feel inspired and positive. Thanks so much! x

  15. Aw amazing positive post, well done on the workshop! The last compliment I received was from a really old friend who I haven’t spoken to in ages. She rang my phone and I was on the tube so it went to voicemail. She left a message saying how she was following my photos on my blog and how much she loved them, that she was so proud of me and that if she ever gets married she’ll book me!! Amazing. I have to admit I may have shed a few tears hearing her voice after so long saying those things…I’d forgotten about it until now Kat, so thanks for reminding me!

  16. Thanks again for yesterday Kat. Had such a great day. Your insights were so useful and I was amazed by how much of your time and energy you gave us all and how relaxed and comfortable you made it all feel. I usually dread speaking in groups but felt totally comfortable to do so yesterday. It was lovely meeting everyone and it was a right Brucey bonus having Lisa and Gareth’s brilliant insights too! xx

  17. What an amazing day I had yesterday – can’t believe the amount of information you’ve shared with us. I’m so happy I made it, and even happier that I stayed until late and continued learning from you, Lisa and Gareth (he seriously knows his stuff!).
    I’m personally not very good at remembering compliments – I tend to remember the negative stuff and play with it in my little brain so much that I start believing it; but as you say, I really must make a conscious effort to focus more on the good stuff so I can try to be a much happier person and a lot more confident; and of course, get rid of all the negative influence in my life and surround myself with positive, happy people who are all about encouraging each other rather than put me down.
    Thank you once again! xx

  18. That is such a good idea to keep all the positive messages you receive : ) I am totally going to do that from now on! xx

  19. Dee

    Oo yeh, and the flip side of this is… if you get good service, like what someone is wearing, think someone has had the best idea…remember to tell ‘em!

  20. Post author

    yeah totally Dee! sometimes i get embarrassed telling someone ‘ooh i love your skirt/hair/make up etc’ but they always smile and i bet it makes their day!

  21. Ooh, just catching up on this! I too had a fab day and took away lots of new tips and loved meeting some lovely peeps. And pleased to see I wasn’t the only one that walked out without paying for dinner!!!

Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *