I have a love/hate relationship with the BBC Three show Don’t Tell the Bride. On the one hand, I love a voyeuristic nosey at other people’s weddings (hello! Wedding blogger criteria number one) but on the other, the obvious sensationalism of shows like this can often get a bit much. I usually sit watching the show wondering if the groom really plans the whole thing himself and if the real truth of the matter is that the production company tell him exactly what to do so they can have the usual drama that seems to follow the programme around. But mostly I wonder if the brides really have no say on ANYTHING. I mean surely you’d give him a few subtle hints beforehand, right?!
A few weeks ago I was contacted by wedding photographer Alistair Veryard who has just shot a ‘Don’t Tell the Bride’ wedding. He asked me if, after it was aired, I would like to blog it too. After seeing a few sneak peeks and I instantly knew I loved the wedding, but I said that I had one condition – that I could ask the couple all those nagging questions that I know everyone else wants to know the answers to too.
So guys, meet Mike & Becky who’s wrestling themed wedding was aired on Don’t Tell The Bride last night.
Hi Mike & Becky! So, how did you get on Don’t Tell The Bride & why on Earth did you want to do it?
We were sat at home watching the show. I remarked that I could do better than the guy on it so Becky picked up her laptop and after a quick Google, found an application form. They were in the last week of casting so we didn’t hold out much hope but applied anyway. We got an email back the next day asking us to go to their offices for a interview.
The question everyone seems to want to know the answer to is: Did you discuss any ‘ground rules’ about what you wanted/didn’t want beforehand?
It was in our contract that we don’t plan anything in advance at all. If the production team suspected that we might have discussed anything or made any plans, then those plans would have to be scrapped. Plus it all happened so quickly that we wouldn’t have had time to make any plans, even if we wanted to. Becky loves surprises so it worked out better to just not plan anything in advance together anyway.
Did you get any criteria from the producers or crew about what you should pick or how you should go about planning the wedding? There always seems to be a drama over something the groom chooses!
I wasn’t given a ‘criteria’ per-say but everything had to be booked through the production team and all shops I wanted to visit or services I wanted to use had to be cleared for filming by the team first.
I did feel as if they were limiting my choices. Sometimes it felt like they were steering me in certain directions and encouraging me to make choices that would be better for their TV show rather than what I might have first had in mind myself.
So did you really make all those decisions yourself or most of them made by the producers or crew? Did you ever worry that Becky wouldn’t like what you’d chosen?
Mostly, I made the decisions myself, though like I said in the previous question, everything I wanted to book had to go through the production team first. So at times I really felt like I had to fight against them to get the things I wanted. I chose Alistair as our wedding photographer as we know him from taking photos at Lucha Britannia, one of the wrestling feds we work for. I really tried my best to have friends work with me and help me out where ever possible. I was confident throughout that if I could make the vision I had in my head a reality, then Becky would love it.
What about the timeframe – was it really all planned in just a few short weeks?
It really does all happen in 3 weeks! For us the whole process from us sending the application form in, to our wedding day was 5 weeks!
Did you read any wedding blogs or magazines when you were planning the wedding to get any ideas?
I actually didn’t do any prior research whatsoever. I just had a vision in my head and then went all out to get it.
Was the process as you expected?
The process wasn’t really what I expected. I thought it would be filmed more like a documentary reality TV show where the production crew would just follow me around and document what I was doing. But the reality was quite different I was unaware beforehand just how involved the production crew would actually get.
We’re you really happy with the final outcome ? Would you do it again or recommend the process it to others now that you know how it works behind the scenes?
I am really happy with the wedding day and am really glad that I fought tooth and nail to have it my way. There were a few times that I came very close to calling it all off during after some big arguments with the production team. At points I felt that they were much more concerned with what they wanted for their TV show, and at times that differed too much from what I wanted for our wedding day. But after those arguments, I mostly got things my way. It was just a lot of extra hard work and extra stress! As if having to plan a wedding and wrestling show in just 3 weeks isn’t hard enough!
I can honestly say that I wouldn’t do it again. I would have loved to have had Becky with me during the planning, though that might have resulted in an entirely different wedding. I would want to plan the same wedding – in fact I wouldn’t change a thing about the wedding day but the major thing I would change is that I would save up the money and do it myself without the TV crew!
Awesome! Well I think it was one of my fave ever episodes and my fave ever couples. Thank you yo much to Becky & Mike for answering my questions and sharing their wedding with us today!
The Gallery
Supporting Cast
Photography Credit: Alistair Veryard
Venue: Battersea Art Centre
Bride’s Dress: Caroline Arthur Couture (designed by the groom)
Bride’s Shoes: Irregular Choice
Groom’s Outfit: Dress2Kill Bespoke Tailoring
Bridesmaid’s Dresses: Caroline Arthur Couture
Cake: Killer Cupcakes
Flowers: Forget Me Not, Cheam
Hair: Robert Masciave, Metropolis Hairdressing
Hotdog & Popcorn Carts: Konio’s
Catering: Revolution
Transport: Charlie Rage’s Monster Truck
I was glued to the TV watching this last night and was really hoping this would be the one you featured. I love how it all came together and thought that becky made a stunning bride – fabulous dress and wonderful hair
I’ve Sky + ed this one, so can’t wait to watch it now! It’s also really interesting to see the photos and how amazing they are, as that’s something the show NEVER focuses on. Good for Mike for standing up to the producers too!
what a great insite to the show! although i still don’t quite believe it isn’t fixed in some ways..
I love this! I didn’t see the show, but this is the cutest wedding ever! Love Love Love!
I felt sorry for the bridesmaid. She looked so uncomfortable with her hair and in that very tight dress. You can sense her discomfort just by looking at the photo at the top of this page.
This is a really fun insight! I can take or leave the show, but it’s very interesting to know the answers to the questions everyone wants to know.
NYC looked epic Kat!
Congratulations to Mike and Becky xxx
I loved it! A friend of mine puled outf of DTtB because of the level of involvement of the production crew so it was fascinating to read an account of someone who had gone through it. Also the thing I loved, and this might seem a little thing, was her snazzy wrist brace! I wear have to wear wrist braces when my condition flares up and I have worried what I will do if I wake up on the day with gozzy wrists – now I know I can wear sparkly ones!
Very interesting to hear the grooms side of the story. I have to admit that I haven’t watched any of the series this time over, although it is all sky + and ready to go. I just felt the whole thing was becoming way to predictable and each episode was the same format.
I’m also very suspicious of TV shows manipulating people and making the whole thing appear how they want it to.
Thanks for the post xx
@Louise – the designer who made the dress also made the cover to go over Becky’s wrist brace. Mike asked her to make it – a lovely touch
I loved this episode, since they were such a lovely couple, but it’s kind of sad to know that the show producers and crew pull the strings so much! Not that I suspected any less, but still. I’m glad Mike fought to have his way, but I’m sorry it was so stressful for him!
What I still want to know is if the groom tells the producers what sort of wedding he’s planning BEFORE the couple gets picked, so that they know how cool or not it’s going to be!
The photography by Alistair is awesome! Becky’s hairstyle rocks!
Fantastic pics of a really unique wedding these pics will still tell the story of their big day when the show is gone and forgotten. Just jealous I didn’t get to shoot it
Fascinating wedding photos! So interesting. Enjoyed looking through these.
It was an absolute pleasure making Becky’s dress – she and Mike were so lovely. The time pressure was just huge but seeing Alistair’s photos, reminds me it was totally worth those late nights of stitching!
Oh my gosh I’m watching this at the moment and it is the most amazing wedding, these two are just adorable and so so in love! And I love the brides hair and make up!!! Love love love!!!
What a funny theme! How cute! Love the Pheasant feathers in becky’s hair, total show stopper!
Wow, it’s fantastic to hear some of the inside story! I haven’t seen this episode yet but looking forward to it, as it looks amazing. I was on a reality type of tv programme once and I’m sure I had to sign something saying I wasn’t meant to talk about the process or something, but great this groom can spill the beans and fill us in
Fantastic photos and love learning the inside story.
This was the best ever; just what a wedding should be, really individual and about the people involved. Mike did a brilliant job fighting for just how he wanted it and Becky looked absolutely amazing. I so wish more people would do it this way!!! Every happiness to them both.
I watched this tonight and the whole way through kept thinking, RockNRoll covered this, it had to be this one! I loved the hair, the groom is a sweetheart and the bride was a lovely down-to-earth girl! First DTTB that I haven’t been screaming at the TV “No, no, no, what are you doing you idiot?!”
I am so going for giant hair when I get hitched! Only thing I didn’t like was the badly made butterflies. You can get much better feather versions on the internet as I use them for my fascinators.
I hope the bride and groom have a very happy married life together! x
Awesome!
Love her hair
Totally fascinating to hear the real story from behind the show, as I’ve often thought that there must be a potential for conflict with producers wanting to up the ante to make a more edgy show! Well Done Mike, for sticking to your guns and getting the wedding you wanted!
This is too awesome! Man, how wish I could have seen this show. It seems pretty cool.
Gosh there are a lot of familiar faces in this wedding! I’m going to have to find this online and have a watch…
Having read thios article, I am going to go and watch this episode – the photos look amazing – the whole weding screams personality and fun! Great to know how they put the show together behind the scenes too.
not sure how i missed this, it’s bloody awesome!!
From someone who has experience of working in telly. I think the ‘pulling the strings’ comment is actually way out of proportion and context. It is very stressful for these boys organising weddings and the first people they lash out to would be the ones closest to them, the crew who have given him the £12k to plan his dream wedding. As part of their deal to take part they must not do/buy anything that the tv crew cannot film, hence why they must have permission to film in shops he wanted to go to. And if you want to say shop in Primark going through a head office for filming permission would take longer than day to do and may also say no. As for the money, if they production team gave the boys £12k in cash, do you really think they would make it to the wedding?
Lol. It’s a gameshow at the end of the day, I’d love someone to give me £12,000 just to get married on tv…and they get mad discounts because of the filming. Get chosen because you say you are going to do a crazy wedding, don’t be surprised if the producers make you stick to your word!
Was just wondering if you have a picture of your hair and I thought it was beautiful and want mine kinda the same.
Or do you have a web page I can take a look at please
Thank you
i watched this last night and i got very annoyed that there was no drama, and everyone was really nice – i thought, wheres my bridezilla…. wheres my selfish groom….. nope! you are all really nice!! grrrr!!!