Tag Archives: wedding planning advice

The Ultimate Guide To Veils & How to Choose the Right One for You

Whether you think you want to wear one or not, I think every bride should try on at least one wedding veil. Like nothing else, veils have the power to completely transform your entire wedding day look and whatever kind of dress you’ve picked, you can totally rock one.

However there are so many different types of veils available that it can be a bit confusing and rather daunting when you start looking for one. Luckily, today we’ve partnered with Britten, experts in the field, who are here to demystify everything veil-related for us!

What are the different types of veil?

Single tier wedding veils

These are what most people imagine when asked to picture a veil. Single tier means that the veil flows from it’s attachment point (normally a comb) down the back. There is no blusher section of veil in front of the face.

Two tier wedding veils

This means that the veil includes a ‘blusher’ which can be pulled forward over the face. This is raised during the ceremony for the first kiss or at the exact moment you are married and is then swept back over the head to form a second layer at the back of the veil. Britten make their blushers 72cm long but they can be made to any length if requested.

Drop veils

This is a two tier veil with no gather at the top. They are often held in place with a headband or hair pins, rather than a comb.

Mantilla veils

This is a single tier veil with no gather at the top. Britten sew a comb to the top of each of theirs so they can be worn at the top of the head. They are also sometimes described as Spanish veils.

Juliet veils

These are where a ‘cap’ of material holds the veil in place. This is a traditional vintage look, dating from 16th century England. It is believed the design dates to actors performing Juliet in the original performances of Shakespeare’s ‘Romeo & Juliet’.

Bandeau veils

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What Getting Divorced Taught Me About Marriage

What Getting Divorced Taught Me About Marriage_Katherine Killeffer for Rock n Roll Bride magazine (4)

It wasn’t until she separated from her husband that writer Gala Darling really started to learn about how to be happily married.

“Divorce is always good news. I know that sounds weird, but it’s true because no good marriage has ever ended in divorce. That would be sad. If two people were married and they just had a great thing and then they got divorced, that would be really sad. But that has happened zero times.” — Louis CK

I got divorced in 2015, and it’s one of the best things I’ve ever done. That’s not to say that I regret getting married — simply that getting divorced was a very positive experience. In the past two years I have completely flourished, grown, and changed beyond my wildest dreams, and I’m also in a relationship with a man who fills my heart in a way I’ve never experienced before.

When my husband moved out, everything transformed. I had what I called “the summer of (radical self) love.” I travelled to Italy and Morocco with two of my best friends, I went out dancing all the time, I filled my house with flowers, and dressed up every day. I started dating and met a bunch of really great guys who made me feel like all was not lost. I began to reclaim and rediscover myself, my sexuality, and my identity.

It’s been a while now, and I’ve had time to unravel what caused my divorce. While it would be easy to point fingers and be accusatory, I think what it simply comes down to is the fact that we both married the wrong person. There were warning signs, of course, but when you’re young and your boyfriend proposes to you, it’s easy to ignore the signals. After all, getting married is exciting! Right?!

It’s a crazy thing, really. I never wanted to get married or have children. My desire was always to be independent: I wanted to travel the world, write books, maybe live in Europe, take lovers. Having someone else in the picture never really mattered much to me. And I had never fantasised about a wedding or a Cinderella-type dress. But somehow, when my then-boyfriend and I started talking about getting married, everything changed.

If I could go back in time, I would gently caution my younger self. I would pay attention to the fact that I was more excited about planning a wedding than I was about planning a life together. Instead of thinking about how “cool” our wedding photos would be, I wish I had thought about how our future would look. I would strip it back and take my time.

What Getting Divorced Taught Me About Marriage_Katherine Killeffer for Rock n Roll Bride magazine (7)

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Spend the Day Together

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Hey you, loved-up-engaged-planning-my-wedding you, can I have a word please? I hope all your planning is going well and that you are gearing up for the day of your dreams. Me? I’m a wedding photographer and I have been for many years now. And here’s a funny thing that after all this time, I’ve only just realised. Like, it’s hit me smack in the face like a wet kipper, realised.

NOBODY TELLS YOU TO SPEND THE DAY TOGETHER

And you know what? Unless you make a concerted effort to, then chances are you simply won’t. Think about weddings: Most couples spend the entire morning apart, they come together for the ceremony (you won’t actually remember much of this bit) then as soon as the confetti has been chucked, you will be talking to the people you know and your lover will be talking to all the people they know. Then apart from your portrait session, chances are you won’t come together again until it’s time to sit for dinner.

Take a good look at most of the weddings on Rock n Roll Bride over over and over again the images with the couple actually together are portraits and formal moments. Cake cutting, speeches, first dance.

Now why do I care? Well, because as a wedding photographer this is the conversation I’m probably going to have with you:

“We love your photography, it’s really natural looking. We hate being in photos, so don’t want to do lots of posing. It would be great if you could just capture us in little moments over the day.”

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I love a challenge but natural and little moments is pretty tough when your couple are on opposite sides of the room or the only significant time they are together is the obvious ‘wedding moments’. I feel like I’m always doing my best to orchestrate ‘natural’. In your couple session, I’m actually hoping to catch those little seconds in between when you think you are being shot, when you are lost in a giggle or just finally looking your favourite person in the face without 100 guests trying to congratulate you. I’m thinking I will get natural when we are walking back from the couple session and you are relaxed as you think formal photos are done with. I’m stalking you all day, camera poised ready but more often than not, I won’t get another shot with you both in it until you are sat at the dinner table.

Once I really thought about it, I began to wonder, is there anything I can do to make a difference?

I shot a wedding last Saturday and I knew that the couple felt super awkward at their engagement shoot. So in the morning I explained to my very lovely bride that if she wanted lots of natural photos to consciously spend the day together with her husband. I told her to make sure they walked together from the ceremony venue to the reception, that they worked the drinks reception together talking to both of your friends and families, that they didn’t just do a first dance together, they did a few. I told them spend the day together to be present through it all.

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Whose Wedding is it, Anyway? Managing Meddling Family Members!

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Weddings and juggling family politics seems to go hand in hand. So much so that may be feeling like wedding planning is more of an exercise in negotiating family dynamics than a celebration of love. But don’t worry, Rock n Roll Bride is here to help!

You’ve set the date of your wedding and you’ve already decided that it’s not going to be a traditional affair. Your wedding is going to be special, out of the ordinary, something that you’re both going to be proud of. You’ve decided on the theme and it’s all going so well: you and your fiancé agree on all the things you want and you’re kind of wondering what all those brides before you were making such a fuss about. This is fun and easy!

But then something unpleasant happens. It’s like when your smoke alarm goes off when you thought nothing untoward was happening on the stove. Suddenly, everyone has an opinion on your choices and obstacles like anxious bridesmaids and meddling mothers get in the way. In expressing their ideas, they seem determined to destroy yours. Sometimes it’s just the sighs and silent shakes of the head which can crush you even further.

I remember the strained words we had over our wedding song. You would not believe that a three-minute bunch of crotchets and semibreves could cause such a rift. Mum laid the back of her hand across her forehead, much like a Renaissance figurine, “You can’t have THAT song!” she cried, “for heaven’s sake, it’s a wedding!”

You might think I was planning to play a funeral march, or the Hokey Cokey. Dear Lord, no. I wanted Queen, I Want to Break Free‘ I don’t think my mum got the irony.

Whose Wedding is it, Anyway Managing Meddling Family Members (12)

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How to Find Wedding Suppliers You Can Trust

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A wedding day is one of the most significant and expensive days of a couple’s life. A perfectly planned stress-free occasion might be top of your agenda, yet the final outcome often lies in the hands of your suppliers. Booking a team of trusted, reputable suppliers to handle your day is of the utmost importance if you want to deliver a seamless celebration.

Today, Be Wedding Wise, the UK’s first fully vetted reviews-based website, are sharing their top tips for spotting the good, the bad and the ugly when it comes to booking your dream team.

Do your homework

The power of the internet

Before booking any suppliers, be sure to check that they have a physical, concrete address and working phone number. Companies House has a free service that lets you check these details, however do be aware that they only cover limited companies so many suppliers will not be found on there. If they’re not a limited company then do a Google Maps search to check the address is genuine and simply pick up the phone to check the number given gets you through to them. It’s also useful to do an Internet search of your supplier’s name and their company name to ensure nothing alarming comes up on any bridal forums or previous negative press coverage.

Where possible, seek personal recommendations and read trusted reviews. There’s nothing more reassuring than knowing another bride and groom are willing to personally verify how great their supplier was for their big day.

It’s also a good idea to see how active a supplier is on any social media sites. This will not only give an insight into how they promote their business but enables you to check that they are active and working in the months leading up to your wedding. Nobody wants their supplier to suddenly go AWOL a few weeks before their wedding day.

Read reviews 

Be Wedding Wise, the UK’s first ever reviews based wedding directory, was started to provide engaged couples with a platform to access thoroughly vetted and validated wedding supplier reviews for their big day. Be Wedding Wise is set to shake up the industry and take the standards of service to new heights.

The company has a strict policy of only accepting suppliers as permanent members once they have received a minimum of two verified customer reviews, the only site in the UK insisting upon this verification process. Every customer testimonial and review is read and verified by the Be Wedding Wise team before being made live, who personally call to check the authenticity. Once suppliers become permanent members, future reviews are randomly spot-checked to ensure continuous credibility.

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Ask plenty of questions

When making the decision on suppliers its important to ask lots of questions such as:

Who do they work with?
If they work with an assistant (florist/photographer) then consider asking to see some of the assistant’s work too.

What if something goes wrong?
Check that they have a contingency plan in the unlikely event that they are ill on your wedding day. Would any of your day be affected by rain? Ask the relevant supplier how they would handle it if the dreaded drops do start to fall.

Are their photos up to date?
When looking at supplier’s product photos (wedding cars, equipment hire etc.) check with the supplier to see how recent their images are. The car may have been photographed 10 years ago when it was shiny and new – it may not be looking quite so smart 10 years on!

Meet face-to-face

Nothing can beat the power of a face-to-face meeting. You can ask as many questions as you like and you won’t have to wait for any answers. It’s also really important to know that you actually like your suppliers and there’s good chemistry. If you love their personality as well as their work then you know it’ll be a match made in heaven. If, on the other hand, you find you’re struggling to ‘click’ face to face then this should perhaps prompt you to look elsewhere.

Trust your gut

Follow your gut instinct. If you’re getting a bad feeling about a supplier then you’re most probably right. If they’re being slow at getting back to you, they’re unwilling to discuss finer details, answer specific questions or the tone of their email isn’t friendly and open, then you should most certainly listen to those alarm bells ringing in your head and consider going elsewhere.

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10 Things I’ve Learnt About Wedding Planning in 10 Years as a Wedding Blogger

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I usually do an introduction type post at the start of every year, where I tell you who I am and show you around the blog… just like a digital tour guide. But this year, my TENTH as a wedding blogger, I thought it would be fun to try something new.

If you’re anything like I was when I first got engaged, right now you’re feeling a heady mixture of emotions – including but not limited to – excitement, nerves, ecstasy and nausea. You have the mammoth task of planning a wedding ahead of you and all the stresses that come with it. OH ISN’T THIS FUN!?

If you’ve stumbled across this site its probably because the idea of a traditional wedding fills you with dread. If you’re worried about how your grandparents will react to you walking down the aisle to your favourite Megadeath song, or wearing a big white dress and covering your tattoos is quite frankly OUT OF THE QUESTION, then good news! You’re in the right place.

Today I want to put your mind at ease and let you in on the 10 most important things I’ve learnt about wedding planning throughout my 10 years in the wedding industry.

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You will NEVER please everybody

I have lost count of the number of brides and grooms who’ve told me they started their wedding planning without wanting to upset anybody, but when the day rolled around they were really pleased they just picked the things that made them happy.

Look, there will always be someone who doesn’t like some of your choices, but – newsflash! – it’s not their wedding, its YOURS. So start your wedding planning off without the headache of trying to keep other people happy and do things that make you squeal with joy. At the end of the day who cares if someone doesn’t like the food you served, the tunes you played or the dress you wore? It’s your wedding and if they don’t like it they can jolly well stay at home!

Choose things that reflect you

When I look back at my own wedding, I do sometimes wish that we’d been braver with some of our choices. I only started this blog mid-way through planning our wedding and the industry was much, much less open to the idea of weddings that were a bit different. Back in 2008 it was pretty radical that my bridesmaids wore black (yes, really!)

I really wish I had walked down the aisle to that rock song we originally wanted, I wish we had taken the risk and booked that quirkier venue that had never hosted a wedding before, and I do wonder what my flowers would have been like if I hadn’t just agreed to everything that the venue’s recommended florist suggested.

At the end of the day, it didn’t matter of course. I still look back with the fondest of memories, but if I could do it all over again, we would 100% be choosing things that were much more reflective of us.

But don’t be an arsehole about it

This is an important one! Yes you are ‘the bride’ but no you are not always right. No you are not the most important person in the world. No, everyone does not have to do what you say and bow down before you.

A wedding is about two people committing their lives to each other, but its also about two families coming together. It’s also about those you love celebrating with you so do not think its acceptable to just do whatever you want without considering other people. Do not stamp your feet if you don’t always get your own way. Compromise is important. The little boy that got everything he ever wanted didn’t live happily ever after (sorry Willy Wonka), the little boy that got everything he ever wanted turned into a massive brat.

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